Today’s Fake 3-2-1 is brought to you by tryptophan, that uncle you tried to avoid today, and the weird can of cranberry whatever the hell that is. Let’s get after it.
3 Fax
1. They hate us cause the ain’t us. You’ve heard all the insults - “I’ll be your boss some day”. “How bout them jobs!” All of them. At the end of the day, those nerds are our little brother and they’re mad that we had more fun in Athens and have better, shall we say, aesthetics on Milledge Avenue than they have on Techwood. They convinced themselves that taking Calc 6 is worth it while we were downtown at Boar’s Head the night before our Sociology in Film final knees deep in Zetas. Them? They got stuck with some 5 from Agnes who’s studying postmodern feminist thought. Then they look up and we’re driving the same cars they are and living in the same neighborhoods they’re in while having had twice the fun in college. “I’ll show them,” they mutter as they go off to their friends house to play another round of Settlers of Catan.
2. It hasn’t been close. Since Tech won 3 in a row - 2 with referee assistance - from 1998-2000, the Dawgs have won 19 of the last 22 against the North Avenue Trade School. Interestingly, this is the first time we’ve played Tech while having something other than a goose egg in the loss column since before you had heard the term “social distancing.” Starting in 2001, the Dawgs have had streaks of 7 wins, 5 wins, and now 6 wins. The longest streak in this series is 8. It’s time to make it 7 on Saturday and we can set a new record next time we see those boys in Athens.
Last year felt close on the scoreboard but we had a TD called back that would have made it a 3 score game when we were a MASH unit. This year we won’t make the same mistakes.
3. Light up Sanford. The Dawgs have won 20 straight games that have kicked off under the lights, and we haven’t lost since 2009 in a home night game. It’s wild to think, but we haven’t played Tech at home at night since 2010. It’s not our fault - we’ve been good. Maybe they could do their part in the future and get us a home night game on Saturday next time as opposed to playing in the Weedeater Bowl every year while we’re playing for titles every yesr after the game. (By the way, Tech is currently projected to play in a bowl in Annapolis, Maryland - just where everyone wants to go for the holidays).
2 questions
1. Are the Dawgs just a different team at home? Let’s face it - the stretch that began in Austin and ended in Oxford was rough. By the end of it, the Dawgs looked more tired than you did this morning at the mile 3 sign of your Turkey Trot. But the last two weeks? The offense has been clicking and the defense once again held UTK under 20. The defense was a little - okay a lot - lackadaisical last week, but I’ll chalk that up to a nooner against a body bag.
2. Who can forget this gem right here?
1 Prediction.
Pain.
3 Fax
1. They hate us cause the ain’t us. You’ve heard all the insults - “I’ll be your boss some day”. “How bout them jobs!” All of them. At the end of the day, those nerds are our little brother and they’re mad that we had more fun in Athens and have better, shall we say, aesthetics on Milledge Avenue than they have on Techwood. They convinced themselves that taking Calc 6 is worth it while we were downtown at Boar’s Head the night before our Sociology in Film final knees deep in Zetas. Them? They got stuck with some 5 from Agnes who’s studying postmodern feminist thought. Then they look up and we’re driving the same cars they are and living in the same neighborhoods they’re in while having had twice the fun in college. “I’ll show them,” they mutter as they go off to their friends house to play another round of Settlers of Catan.
2. It hasn’t been close. Since Tech won 3 in a row - 2 with referee assistance - from 1998-2000, the Dawgs have won 19 of the last 22 against the North Avenue Trade School. Interestingly, this is the first time we’ve played Tech while having something other than a goose egg in the loss column since before you had heard the term “social distancing.” Starting in 2001, the Dawgs have had streaks of 7 wins, 5 wins, and now 6 wins. The longest streak in this series is 8. It’s time to make it 7 on Saturday and we can set a new record next time we see those boys in Athens.
Last year felt close on the scoreboard but we had a TD called back that would have made it a 3 score game when we were a MASH unit. This year we won’t make the same mistakes.
3. Light up Sanford. The Dawgs have won 20 straight games that have kicked off under the lights, and we haven’t lost since 2009 in a home night game. It’s wild to think, but we haven’t played Tech at home at night since 2010. It’s not our fault - we’ve been good. Maybe they could do their part in the future and get us a home night game on Saturday next time as opposed to playing in the Weedeater Bowl every year while we’re playing for titles every yesr after the game. (By the way, Tech is currently projected to play in a bowl in Annapolis, Maryland - just where everyone wants to go for the holidays).
2 questions
1. Are the Dawgs just a different team at home? Let’s face it - the stretch that began in Austin and ended in Oxford was rough. By the end of it, the Dawgs looked more tired than you did this morning at the mile 3 sign of your Turkey Trot. But the last two weeks? The offense has been clicking and the defense once again held UTK under 20. The defense was a little - okay a lot - lackadaisical last week, but I’ll chalk that up to a nooner against a body bag.
2. Who can forget this gem right here?
1 Prediction.
Pain.
